Back To The Hotel (1992) - N2Deep
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Like Country, Like Hotel

by Jenna

We all know Trump is a hotel man.  That’s a given.  But, I don’t think there’s been enough analysis of how his demeanor and actions as President are wholly influenced by his long tenure as a hotel magnate.

 

Trump’s campaign was thick with “run government like a business” rhetoric, but it’s now evident that he runs the country like a very specific business -- the hotel.  And let’s face it, Trump’s never been a work horse.  He runs his hotelz with as much hands-on activity as a high-end hotel guest.

 

Our Commander-In-Chief is adamant about his continental breakfast!  With purpose and intention, he spends more time at Mar-A-Lago than the White House.  And based on what we know of his taxes and his commitment to keeping all other such info confidential, his presidency is likely comp'd.  

 

What follows is a careful analysis of this "like country, like hotel" trend:

 

Immigration Policy: Members only, bitchez!  Like a hotel manager wouldn’t hesitate to kick any non-patrons the eff out -- even hiring a private security force as a first matter of business -- Trump beefed up his immigration force right away.  Like a hotel guest fetching ICE, Trump made it his first chore on arrival. 

 

Executive Power:  Hotel guestz have to push all the buttonz just to see what they can do.  They run around the suite trying out every gadget in reach.  Trump loves a doohickey as much as the next guy.  Most presidentz wait until the last days of their final term before pushing the pardon button as it's often a highly controversial move.  But not our penthouse guest Trump!  He's already lit up 8 pardonz -- including the first within 6 monthz of his inauguration!  State of Emergency?  Pushed it!  North Korea acting up?  Spark up some nuke annihilation talk -- the original and proverbial button!  He’s on top of the world!  He’s on vacation, baby!  What happens in D.C., stays in D.C.!

 

Terminationz:  Now, while it’s true that his days as The Apprentice star contributed to his free-wheeling, “everybody must be fired” attitude, it’s also fair to say that said attitude stems from his days running hotelz.  One misstep and the axe can drop.  Hotelz can easily survive with a constant flow of new workerz.  Likewise, Trump hires and fires like there’s no shortage of unskilled cabinet memberz and adviserz to choose from.  Bannon, Pruitt, Conway, Sessions, Mooch, Giuliani, Kushner -- it’s all good.

 

Anyway, based on all this, I think Trump will LBJ this mofo and not seek a second term.  Everybody knows that, while vacation is awesome, it can burn us out and it’s quickly time to go home ;))

June 2019